19/11/12

Today I travelled into Ceduna.
It was a freaking hot day so I gladly spent a bit of time getting some much needed laundry done.
It wasn't until talking to Laura a week later that I remembered we were advised to steer clear of the town as it has a reputation for putting the "D" in dodgy.
So it was with this temporary amnesia that I, for some reason, decided to spend the night in the dodgiest van park in one of the dodgiest towns east of the Nullabor.

Nothing quite like the smell of wafting garbage to help you get to sleep at night

After a year of travel, seeing all sorts of different sites and meeting all different types of people, nothing much seems to phase me, and despite the less than perfect circumstances I was greeted with when I got to the van park, I was able to laugh at the situation and sleep easily.
For the record, I jotted in my diary a few of my experiences as follows:

* The guy at reception, eloquently using the "f" word at least three times per sentence, took great delight in lecturing me that Wagga is the most backward place in the country, full of old "C"s who control all the money and if they had any sense they would get the Army to take a couple of weeks to build a canal system so the city doesn't flood. Interesting.

* When I parked the van I met the caretaker who was a nice enough bloke but spookily looked like Mealoaf in his beast form in the "I would do anything for love (but I won't do that)" film clip.

* He then advised me that if I was after any drugs, the local drug dealers are down the back but to get on to them tonight if I wanted anything because they're being evicted tomorrow. Good to know.

* He then told me about how he's had to bust a few heads of people who had been playing up but the last couple of weeks had been fairly quiet, apart from when a bloke was murdered down the road last week. Eeek.

* As he was telling me this, his two little dogs were getting a bit amorous near my feet and he kindly informed me "I keep telling him she's his sister but it doesn't stop him from trying to f*ck her...they're too young to mate anyway so it's ok for now..."   Cool.

* He then tried to upgrade me to a caravan for an extra $7 and the luxury of a Tv and air conditioning. I reluctantly agreed as it was rather hot and some air con would have been nice. When I opened up the van though I was greeted with a delightful new aroma with each step. Step. Cigarette smoke. Step. Stale beer. Step. Urine. Step.Vomit. Step. Wet dog. Step. Mould. Etc etc. Needless to say, the van was filthy and I was definitely sleeping in Freda.

* And upon further inspection, it was revealed that there was no air con and that the tv had been stolen by the previous tenants. Surprise, surprise.

There was probably some other BS that went down but that was all I wrote in my diary and my memory of the place is thankfully quite sketchy now.
It's funny, you read Stephen King novels with what you think are exaggerated characterisations of people down on their luck and living a pretty rough life in trailer parks but these people are real and these situations do exist.
Anyway, I survived Ceduna but I won't be back any time soon. You can bet on that.